Friday, August 17, 2007

REGGIE WANTS NOTHING MORE THAN HIS FREEDOM! IF WE'RE AS COMPASSIONATE AS WE CLAIM TO BE, IT'S TIME TO GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTS!!!

Here in the Los Angeles area, we see and deal with lots of celebrities. We have Lindsay, we have Paris, our Mayor. You get the idea. And a good number of you have become sick of our celebrities. Especially those who can't seem to stay out of trouble or to keep their pants on.

And then there's Reggie. Some of you outside of Los Angeles might have heard of him. Maybe most of you.

Reggie's an alligator who was dumped into the Machado Lake after his owner woke up one day and realized Reggie had gotten too big for the San Pedro backyard he was living in. Truth be known, Reggie's former owner might have worried about becoming Gator food one day, but in the still of night, Reggie was dumped into the lake. And Reggie stayed there for almost two years. He's a sneaky gator 'cause it was only by accident that one day, someone said, "Whaaat?!?" and called the authorities.

Because no one else saw Reggie and some good gator trackers were brought in to see and to capture Reggie without success, a lot of folks got to thinkin' we had some kind of Loch Ness Monster on our hands. In other words, a fable.

No, Reggie wasn't a fable. He was just slick.

The day Reggie wasn't as slick as he had been, was the day he got caught. And he wasn't happy about it.

Because Reggie had become more than an alligator who might in other circumstances be shot and or killed by scared citizens after he (Reggie) had done some terrorizing of his own, folks in these here parts didn't quite know what to do with him after they captured him.

In addition to celebrities, we have a lot of bright people here and one of those bright people suggested that Reggie be taken to the Los Angeles Zoo where entrepreneurs (in this case, zoo officials) could do what these kinds of folks always do with celebrities. Figure out a way to make money off of them.

Well, these bright folks forgot how Reggie had become a celebrity. He's cunning, he's slick, he's sneaky. He's Reggie! And less than a week after being in his new home, sometime around midnight, Reggie scaled the fence and took a little freedom walk.

There's a lot of public park area around the zoo and just imagine for a second that you and a date might have been doing a little late night drinkin' at the park 'cause...Well, 'cause you had some other things on your mind for you and your date to do later and all of a sudden you see Reggie walkin', or slitherin' toward you. You think maybe at that point you're deciding to never have another drink or impure thoughts regarding future companions?

It turns out that after tracking Reggie's wet trail, Reggie was heading in a direction that made some folks think he was looking for the Harbor Freeway. Zoo officials found Reggie near a loading dock by the education building and when they attempted to wrap him up and bring him back to captivity, Reggie let it be known that he was more than a little annoyed.

Reggie is now back in the Los Angeles Zoo, in a more secure exhibit space. People can now gawk at Reggie and take pictures of L.A.'s newest celebrity. Who knows? Maybe Reggie will even smile for the camera.

No creature likes being in a captive state, folks. You wouldn't like it. I wouldn't like it. I can't imagine a lion liking it. Or an elephant. But for better or worse, those creatures, after a while seem to get used to it.

Reggie was free when he was in Lake Machado and after less than a week at the zoo, he scaled a fence to become free again.

If we are as compassionate as we like to think we are, it's time to do the right thing here. Take Reggie on another trip. Oh, he'll be annoyed at first, but when he sees what happens after you let him go, in a place where other alligators live, play and survive, he'll probably be happy to give you one last....smile for the camera.

IF YOU'RE WONDERING ABOUT NEW FILMS THAT OPEN TODAY:

The reviews are pretty strong for the new teen comedy, "Superbad" and the reviews are mixed for the new Nicole Kidman/Daniel Craig thriller, "The Invasion". I'm going to try to see "The Invasion" sometime this weekend.

TV SHOWS THAT ARE HOT, HOT, HOT:

If you haven't checked out "Damages", Tuesday night's on FX, you're missing out on some terrific television! I thought the first episode of Showtime's "Californication" wasn't anywhere near as bad as a lot of critics thought it was. I'm definitely watching the second episode Monday night. Have you checked out "Rescue Me", Wednesday night's on FX? Is there a more tortured lead character on television than the character played by Denis Leary? The Sunday night tripleheader on Lifetime that ends with "Army Wives" is also still good television.

In fact the best television is on cable now!

I HATE TO END WITH A DOWNER, BUT...

Are you following this home mortgage business? The continuing China toy thing? And now we learn the Bush Administration wasn't aware of some IRS regulations that will keep Homeland Security officials from vigorously cracking down on illegal immigrants?!?

What were we thinking when we elected these people, folks?

EDITOR'S NOTE: Don't forget! You can HEAR this blog! The links to the stations broadcasting today's blog can be found at the bottom of my links section which is to the right of what you're reading now. It's the last links.

A new blog is written every morning, Monday through Friday and is posted between 7 and 7:15, Pacific Time. Sometimes earlier. Questions and comments can be sent to scottstjames@sbcglobal.net. I do write back.

MONDAY: If I see it, I'll tell you what I thought of "The Invasion" and anything else that makes me say, "Whaaaat?!?"

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYBODY!!!!

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